Politics & The Pen & Me

or How To Reluctantly Accept That People Are Generally Good

“It’s like when you were a kid and you found a ball of writhing worms, except most of the worms are nice.”

They were the first words that came to mind and I try not to get in the way of any mental harvest these days. I used that line with a few people to describe my first impression of what is the chi-chi schmoozefest that is the Politics & The Pen event.

It felt mostly accurate and a little funny. On brand.

For those of you in America, Politics & The Pen is the Canadian equivalent of the White House Correspondents’ Dinner.

For those of you in Canada, Politics & The Pen is the Canadian equivalent of the White House Correspondents’ Dinner.

The event is put together as a fundraiser and award ceremony by The Writers’ Trust of Canada and it attracts about 500 of the Who’s Who in Canadian politics and very few Who’s Thats.

Everywhere I looked I recognized faces.
Even more astonishing is that those faces recognized… me.

It was slightly daunting. Like I’d been rumbled. Found out. Like whispering a joke about your teacher to your classmate but the teacher heard it, then shook your hand told you they love your work.

There are few things that could have prepared me for an enthusiastic and warm welcome hug from Elizabeth May, leader of the Green Party. Who greeted me like we were long lost but recently reunited best friends. It was lovely.

There are few things that could have prepared me for for the candid and warm greeting from Seamus O’Regan, Minister of Labour, as he gave me a thug hug, during which I admitted I had made a video making fun of him and his apparent lack of a tripod, or perhaps just a resolute and admirable anti-tripod stance, mere hours before.

There are few things than could have prepared me for the humbling feeling I got when I interrupted Evan Solomon’s conversation to say Hello as we recognized each other and then he introduced me to the person he had been speaking to until the point… Yulia Kovaliv, the Ukrainian Ambassador to Canada.

There is nothing that could have prepared me for the out of body experience of standing around after the event chatting to Neil MacDonald (Norm’s brother and legendary journalist) and MP Scott Aitcheson as Neil told us stories about Norm and shared seriously crass, seriously hilarious jokes complete with full body actions.

(Pictured: Author moments before being told by Neil MacDonald something like “You always have that sardonic fucking expression”)

To paraphrase David Byrne, how the fuck did I get here?

As someone who has made a living making videos mostly in and around his home in a small town, it’s easy to forget that the people I poke fun at… actually exist.

Full disclosure, I had been invited to the event by TikTok Canada who are keen to chat with the Canadian government to answer their questions and assure them they are no more evil than other foreign-owned evil social media platforms (Spoiler: when you live in Canada, they’re all foreign-owned and they all know as much about us as they want to).

Fuller disclosure, I was expressly told by TikTok Canada that I was not there to shill for TikTok Canada and I didn’t. I drank their booze and ate their food but shill and/or perform Bond-like espionage? I did not. Though I looked the part in my tux. Tuxedos do a great job of making jowls look sexy. Right? RIGHT?

Though I did, in my position as professional buffoon/satirist, enjoy the luxury of being able to fly above the partisan and corporate lines. I didn’t have to play any games. I didn’t have to adhere to any strategy. I just got to enjoy chatting with people who do the important but filthy work of politicians.

Some are great.
Most are great, actually.
Very few are slimy.

Turns out, they’re just people.

I’m still going to make fun of them though.

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(Pictured: Author poses with former Prime Minister Joe Clark to prove theory that tuxedos make jowls look hawtt)