ASLEEP AT THE WHEEL

or How To Avoid Feeling Like You're Doing Something When You're Really Not

It was about 2AM.

Well, just shortly after 2AM. Probably closer to 2:30.

Traffic had been stopped for ages on the 401. For trivia’s sake, the 401 is North America’s busiest highway with about 500,000 cars passing through the Toronto section alone each and every day.

This day, however, all half a million seemed to be stopped. Then creeping forward. Then stopping for ages again.

It’s the most dangerous type of traffic, in my opinion. The pauses let you relax or defocus and then suddenly you’re forced to refocus and accelerate because, let’s face it, no one wants to be stuck on the highway at any time let alone 2-something AM in the morning.

It was at one of those refocus and accelerate points that I noticed her.

A young woman in the lane next to us. Car in park. Head back. Mouth agape. Sound asleep.

People honked. I honked.

It’s not that she was in my way, but I think all those who saw her quickly realized that sitting idle and sound asleep in the middle of six lanes of traffic that really just want to get home and are probably struggling to retain their own awakedness is not the safest place to be.

I honked again. We all honked again. No luck.

She wasn’t dead or in a state of medical emergency.
We could see little movements and snorts and it was apparent that she was just… literally asleep at the wheel.

With no opportunity to stop safely ourselves, we all drove on.

I checked the news the next day. No serious accidents reported on that stretch of the highway, so I’m assuming she eventually woke up. Thank goodness.

I’ve been thinking about this recently as my brief bout with Covid (5 days of crapulence followed by another 10+ days of coughing), threw my July schedule out the window and I sunk into a malaise.

I had things to do. I knew the things I had to do.
Worse, I knew I had things I WANTED to do.
But motivation was nowhere to be found, so starting anything seemed like an insurmountable task.

A giant mental traffic jam of “what’s the point?”

I had gotten stuck in that traffic jam, put the car in park, and fell asleep at the wheel.

I’d like to report that I discovered some magical thought or method to re-engage myself, but, sadly, that’s not the case.

I just got tired of being stuck.

So I forced myself to put the car in gear, widened my eyes and eased forward on the accelerator…. and by that I mean I started working on the things I knew I had to get started working on.

Was it an instant feeling of contentment? A feeling of “YES! This feels right!”?
No.

It was more a feeling of going through the motions for the sake of going through the motions.

But then, after a bit, I felt some anticipation for upcoming tasks and challenges.

I felt like the traffic jam had cleared and I was ready to pick up speed again.

I don’t think we can avoid these traffic jams. They happen when they happen. However, I think it’s probably good to know and remember that they don’t last forever.

So rest when you get the chance, but don’t give in to that resignation completely.
It’s not always safe.

Before you know it, you’ll be on your way again.

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(Pictured: Author pretends like he didn’t have to a full body roll onto the ground to successfully exit the McLaren 720S)